My Poetry - The Ocean Soul

My tears fill the ocean of my soul

The hope that once was there, sunken down to Sheol.

You let me down and I ne'er recovered.

Nor did I want to.

I had to find another way.

A way unlike any other day.

And the day that I was finally able to say,

"I'm finally free to be me"

And in that freedom comes growth.

In that time the seeds were sown,

I was finally able to come into my own,

To believe in a love that I've never known,

To see you, how you see me.

The seed sprouted and burrowed in the ground,

Past the dirt and past the stone,

Spreading like wildfire when it hit the ocean

Until the roots sprung me from the nether.

And in that growth came acceptance.

Then I flew, like a falcon, from Duat,

And in Osiris' embrace, I wept

In this pathway to the stars, I leapt

As Isis embraced me, like a mother.

Never having felt this love before

Silence from the Gods, no more,

My heart has truly been restored,

My soul is truly an ocean.

© Spiritual Animystical

My Poetry - The Technicolor Coat

I saw the look that you gave me

And I know that you don't approve.

But do you have to be so blatantly obvious,

Or are you just looking for an excuse?

I don't understand the hate for me,

Or why you so despise.

If you truly had love in your heart,

You'd look at me without judgmental eyes.

What did I ever do to you,

To make you hate me so?

Is this some type of vengeance?

Why do you feel the need to go low?

I've never judged you for believing,

I've just questioned some of your motives.

Using scripture to hurt people,

Is not something that I can go with.

My coat of many colors,

Is something that brings me happiness.

Just for once, can you be pleasant,

And get over your own prejudices?

But I will wrap myself up

In the safety of this technicolor dream.

I'm not going to care what you think,

Because this is my life to seam.

© Spiritual Animystical

My Poetry - Yesterday

Forgiveness is something that I’ve always struggled with.

Because no matter what I say or do, I can’t forget.

I can’t forget the pain, because unlike a broken bone, the wounds from a scarring word won’t heal.

They never heal.

Always there.

An ever-constant reminder of the trauma that ensued.

The memories of the bullies as they tormented me in school.

Or the fact that my family hurt me more than any stranger ever could.

It wasn’t a bittersweet symphony, it was just bitter.

The taste of blood in my mouth is ever so present.

Repeatedly punched in the heart,

How are you supposed to forgive that?

Decades after the harm was done, it still feels like yesterday.

I remember that song in grade school as we sang it in chorus.

I never understood what it was about, I just knew my teacher loved it.

“Yesterday. All my troubles seemed so far away

Now it looks as though they're here to stay

Oh, I believe in yesterday.”

But my troubles are only a thought away.

And like an emotional manifestation brought to life, I double over in pain as I remember the strife.

To forgive is to forget, at least that’s what they say.

But I can’t forget, and no matter how hard I try, I can’t escape.

This is the only way I’ve ever known.

These are the only seeds I’ve ever sown.

No amount of therapy can take away the pain.

And as much as I try to learn forgiveness, it’s a constant stain.

Like the spaghetti I dropped on my nice white shirt,

An ever-constant reminder of how much I’ve been hurt.

How do I stop the flow of red?

How do I forgive when I can’t forget?

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING:

I took a Zoom Creative Writing Class and the topic was forgiveness. It was just a free-flowing, no deleting, just whatever comes out kind of poem.