My Poetry - Alternatality

I've slipped into an alternate reality

Or maybe all I knew was lies.

Maybe it's the frailty

Of unforgiven cries

Maybe it was the dragon dormant

Hidden and never seen

Or the demon behind Judas

Hidden by a scream

The man that once was King

Twisted by the gold

Gnashing and gnarling

All he wants is more

To get it he will hurt

The ones that he loves most

Evil hath conspired

An eternity has been lost

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING: This was inspired by the movie The Hobbit.

My Poetry - Mind Games

Heartbroken

Mind token

Stick the quarter in

See what you win

Another heart attack?

Another mind game?

Don't believe the hype

The slots are always rigged

The odds are against you

And the people are too

Life is the ultimate chance

But chance is always cruel

So whether your game is dice

Or the lever you pull down

It's not just money you lose

But the sanity that's kept you ground

© Spiritual Animystical

My Poetry - The Original Black Sheep

I am the original black sheep

I am the one you view as weak

But my spirit can't be beat

And I will not retreat

I am the ugliest duckling

And I've got tiny wings

But you're never going to win

You're just arguing for nothing

In the end you can pray for me

And I can pray for you

But it doesn't really matter

Cuz it's not up to me or you

So why all the drama?

The hypocrisy of it all

None of us are right

And we're all going to fall

 Get off of your high horse

Stop telling everyone they're wrong

Pull that plank out of your eye

Stop trying to fuck us all

 Hypocrites and liars

Schemers and deniers

"Do as I say not as I do"

With a big grin and a "Howdy doo!"

 Mind rape; blind rape

I offer my other cheek

To the world and its people

Aim your arrows at me

 I've lost the will to care

This world is too much to bear

Speaketh, I shall dare

And risk the slap and evil stares

But I will not be silent

My words, though few, will be heard

And though the dark, it beckons

My heart will be pure

INFORMATION:

Drew the image on 7/15/2020.

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING: This goes out to christians and manipulators of the Word of God. Think Westboro Baptist. Think of the religions and churches that used the Bible to condone slavery and racism, just as WBC uses it to promote hatred against homosexuals. Or to the certain pastors that say feminism is evil. This poem says that we're all fubar.

My Poetry - Virtue

You turned your back on the world and forgot yourself

The 40 days and 40 nights became a 7 year itch in a prison cell

You hide the monster inside but it cracks the surface

And it claws at your soul, no heart left for purpose

An empty space where your heart used to be

You've become the asshole you never wanted to be

Now you're stuck in this life of commiserating

The blackened heart, once beating, now lay dormant; a pity

Exhausted; you spend every moment breathing

Fire and brimstone your unlikely heaven

But when darkness consumes all that you see

Then darkness controls everything

The devil, he smiles as his plan comes to fruition

An apple a day won't keep Death at bay

Eve couldn't resist and she had perfection

Mortality's grip on a God-given day

The struggle of life; a righteous passage

Is death our only escape on this narrow path

Frailty is a virtue in this broken world

It's our only hope in a world gone cold

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING: - If you think I'm critical of others, you should realize that I'm also very hard on my own self as well, for I know I have a whole boardwalk of planks in my eye. This poem is all about self degradation, turning that critical eye on myself.

My Poetry - Waiting for Death

My Poetry - Waiting for Death

I'm one of those weird people

Who think we should mourn births and celebrate deaths

Because if life has taught me one thing

It's that it's just a grandiose scheme

And only those entitled get the time well spent

So I'm just sitting here waiting for death

Because I can't scream and I can't breathe yet

When birth is life and life leads to death

Time's just wasted in a misery of dread

Until I see you for the first time

Until I see you again

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING:

First off, let me preface this poem by saying that some inspiration for it came from the movie In Time with Justin Timberlake.  It is quite an intriguing movie that makes you think about things.  When time is money, literally, the world is split like it is now... with those with ample time because they were born into the life that entitled them to it, and those that struggle every day, not knowing if by the end of the day that they'll run out of time.  It's an interesting concept, and still makes me think, a month after I saw it.  It also comes to me after the birth of my great nephew Chase.  It got me thinking about life, death, and the stuff that fills the in between.  And some of it comes from the own inner workings of my depressed angst self.

My Song - You Break, You Buy

(1st Verse) 

When I gave you my heart

I knew it was yours

I don't want it back

You broke it,

You bought it

And I'm fine with that

And as the wound heals

In that empty chest cavity where my heart used to be

I know that I'll be fine with my misery

(Chorus)

You break, you buy

You screw, I cry

But in the end

When all is said and done

I'm over you

(2nd Verse)

When I said "I do"

I could hardly believe

The six years of lies that you told me

And the hole

It hurts

But it doesn't compare to the chains that held me in captivity

(Chorus)

You break, you buy

You screw, I cry

But in the end

I'm over you

No refunds

No exchanges

All sales are final

And in the end

When all is said and done

I'm over you

So keep the heart

Because I'd rather be

Completely free of my misery

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING: A new song I wrote the other day on the cusp of what would have been my 8th Wedding Anniversary.  I joked on Twitter afterwards that instead I should look at it as two and a half years sober, lol.  I'm still working on it, and I haven't put it to music or anything yet, but just felt the need to get it out there.

My Song - Who Loves Me

Do they sing to you like they sing to me?

Just the crickets chirping in the breeze

A man asked me if I was lonely

Maybe once before but not now you see

I've got the earth and the sky for company

I've got the earth and sky to tempt me

I don't mind butterflies they're nice to me

I don't like mosquitoes pesky little things

Little vampires

Sucking me dry

Like oxygen in the midst of a forest fire

Like oxygen amiss in a deep sea dive

Can you breathe me? (x4)

All the whippoorwills sing they love me

© Spiritual Animystical

MEANING:

This song I'm going to say is probably the 2nd or 3rd best song I've written.  It's short and sweet in lyrics, but long in metaphor and melody.

I downloaded some EP's last week that really inspired me to get back to my keyboards and synthesize!  I love 80's music, and apparently so does Dan Haseltine from Jars of Clay and a new fave band of mine, The Hawk in Paris.

I just love that these guys from Jars have their side projects.  I think it makes things so much better when they do finally come back together and create music for Jars of Clay.  I think maybe it keeps them from being bored, or going crazy, lol.  So Dan's other band, The Hawk in Paris, is quite different, and definitely picking up where The Cure, Depeche Mode, and so many of the great 80's bands left off.  They are bringin' da 80's back!!!  And I love every song on their two EP's.  So that partially inspired me.

Then, I had such a great night last Wednesday.  And I wrote this song that night in the midst of some funky tweets and Facebook updates.  When my muse hits, I go with it.  So it hit, and I instantly knew it was a keeper.  And not only that, I instantly knew I wanted it synthesized!  This song was not meant for the ukulele.  This was going to pull from all the 80's bands I know and love and harness their power as well as The Hawk in Paris.

The beginning starts out with a major influence from A Flock of Seagulls, in the fact that I tried to bring the cricket sound in the beginning, much like their seagull sound in a few of their songs.  Hopefully you picked that up.  The people I played it for noticed it, which made me feel like a job well done.

The metaphor I will leave open to you, but I will say this, it can be the earth asking, or you asking, or God asking.  But I'm going to leave that open to your interpretation.  Who loves me?  Who loves you?  Who loves it?  Who loves God?  Who does God love?  Who loves the earth?  Who does the earth love?  So many different questions we have, but it all comes down to who loves us?  Who Loves Me?

The man asking if I was lonely came from a conversation I had with a family friend that asked me how I was doing after my divorce, and was I lonely.  My response to him was "I was more lonely in my marriage, than I am right now."  And honestly, that is so true.  I don't feel lonely at all right now.  Of course I'd love somebody to hug and kiss and say "I love you" but honestly, it'll happen when God wants it to.  I'm not going to force it.  We see how well it turned out for me before... not anxious to repeat that again.  So that part was personal but I think it could pertain to us all.  We are constantly hurt by those around us.  When our hearts are broken we wonder if we can ever love again, or who will love us with all of our baggage.  Again, that central theme, who loves me?  And also the theme of sweetness (butterflies and whippoorwills) mixed with the heartaches (mosquitoes and vampires).

Can you breathe me... a simple line that is my favorite part of the song.  I will explain this though from my perspective.  As a photographer I get to be up close and personal with nature a lot.  I love it.  I get to see some beautiful skies, lovely surroundings, and amazing animals.  And I just stop and take a breath and appreciate what God has made for me... for all of us.  It's breathing in love.  Whether it's God asking or you asking or me asking, that's open to how you feel about it.  That's the great thing about writing metaphorically.  And that's the great thing about music.  It can move each person so differently.

I hope you like the song, I was so happy to have written and record it.  So many keyboard tracks on this one, but yet it sounds so simple.  Thanks for listening!  God bless!!!

My Poetry - Measure of Man

Take flight

Do not be afraid

This life has its bumps

But it's measured in its pain 

The struggle

Don't fight against it

The righteousness of man

Is found in the depth of love giv'n

When love prevails

God's kingdom is known

And all who seek God

Mercy and forgiveness are shown

© Spiritual Animystical